Christmas Jokes

Q: What does Jack Frost like best about school?
A: Snow and tell.
Q: What do you get if you cross an iPad with a Christmas tree?
A: A pineapple!
Q: What has a jolly laugh, brings you presents and scratches up your furniture?
A: Santa Claws.
Teacher: Jimmy, define claustrophobia.
Jimmy: Fear of Santa Claus?
Q: What do elves do after school?
A: Their gnome work!
Q: What nationality is Santa Claus?
A: North Polish.
Q: What do call Santa when he stops moving?
A: Santa Pause!
Q: How much did Santa pay for his sleigh?
A: Nothing, it was on the house!
Q: Why are there only snowmen and not snowwomen?
A: Because only men would stand out in the snow without a coat.
Q: Where do snowmen go to dance?
A: The snowball.
Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Frosted Flakes.
Q: What do you get if you cross Santa and a dog?
A: Santa Paws!
Q: What do they sing under the ocean during the winter?
A: Christmas Corals!
Q: Where does a snowman keep his money?
A: In a snow bank.
Q: Which of Santa’s reindeer has bad manners?
A: Rude-olph!
Q: How do you know when Santa’s in the room?
A: You can sense his presents.
Q: What’s the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet?
A: The Christmas alphabet has NOEL!
Q: Why did the elf go to school?
A: To learn his ELFabet.
Q: What’s a child’s favourite king at Christmas?
A: A stocKING!
Q: Why does Santa like to wear bells?
A: Because he loves a good bell-y laugh!

Q: How do snowmen travel around?
A: By ice-icle!
Q: How do snowman greets each other?
A: They say ‘Ice to meet you’!
Q: What do you sing at a snowman’s birthday party?
A: ‘Freeze a jolly good fellow!’
Q: What kind of ball doesn’t bounce?
A: A snowball!
Q: What do snowmen wear on their heads?
A: Ice caps.
Q: How do sheep say Merry Christmas in Mexico?
A: Fleece Navidad!
Q: What is a snowman’s favorite lunch?
A: An Iceberger!
Q: What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A: A cookie sheet!
Q: What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas?
A: Thanks, I’ll never part with it!
Q: What did the big candle say to the little candle?
A: I’m going out tonight.
Q: Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?
A: Because it soots him.
Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
A: Snowflakes.
Does Santa Claus refer to his elves as ‘subordinate clauses’?
Teacher: Jimmy, define claustrophobia.
Jimmy: Fear of Santa Claus?
Q: What do elves do after school?
A: Their gnome work!
Q: Why did the elf go to school?
A: To learn his ELFabet.
Daughter: Mum, can I have a canary for Christmas?
Mum: NO! You’ll have turkey like everyone else.

Christmas Jokes and Worksheets for Children